Popular YouTube animator Max Gilardi, better known online by his handle hotdiggedydemon, has revealed that he is considering doctor-assisted euthanasia in Switzerland after years of living with chronic pain, worsening health complications, and mounting financial pressure.
The 38-year-old content creator made the emotional announcement during a livestream on Saturday, where he spoke candidly about the physical, emotional, and financial challenges that have dramatically changed his life over the past two years. The revelation shocked many of his fans, who have followed his work for more than a decade and know him for his satirical animated videos that parody well-known franchises such as Five Nights at Freddy’s and My Little Pony.
Gilardi has built a substantial audience on YouTube, amassing more than 2.1 million subscribers and nearly half a billion video views through his distinctive animation style and dark humor. However, behind the success, he says he has been fighting a relentless battle with chronic illness that has left him struggling to continue producing content.
According to Gilardi, his health began to decline significantly after he was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 2024. Fibromyalgia is a chronic condition characterized by widespread musculoskeletal pain, fatigue, sleep disturbances, and cognitive difficulties. While the exact cause remains unknown, the disorder can severely impact a person’s quality of life, making even routine daily activities difficult.
During the livestream, Gilardi described living with constant pain that affects nearly every part of his body. He explained that exhaustion has become a permanent part of his daily routine, often forcing him to spend much of his time lying down instead of working.
“I’m tired all the time,” he said. “I spend a lot of my time lying down. I get a lot of bad pain in all my joints and my muscles, ankles, shins, hands, knees, hips, neck. I have a lot of difficulty sleeping.”
Beyond fibromyalgia, Gilardi disclosed that he has been experiencing additional neurological symptoms that doctors have yet to fully explain. These include episodes of sudden drooling, difficulty speaking, and other unexplained medical issues that have added to his frustration and uncertainty.
The ongoing medical investigations, combined with frequent treatments and appointments, have also placed a heavy financial burden on the creator. As someone whose income depends largely on consistently producing online content, Gilardi said his declining health has made it increasingly difficult to maintain the workload necessary to support himself financially.
Reflecting on his situation, he remarked, “There’s nothing more expensive than living.”
Gilardi explained that after considering numerous alternatives, he believes physician-assisted dying in Switzerland has become the option he is now seriously evaluating. Switzerland is one of the few countries where assisted dying is legally available under certain circumstances, although strict legal and medical requirements apply.
He emphasized that his decision has not been impulsive but rather the result of prolonged reflection as his physical condition and financial struggles have continued to worsen.
“After considering every option I could think of, ultimately that solution has taken the form of doctor-assisted euthanasia,” he told viewers.
He further described his current reality as one defined by continuous suffering and an endless cycle of trying to survive financially while managing debilitating health problems.
“My existence has become one where I suffer and barely scrape by so I can continue to sustain an existence where I barely scrape by and suffer,” he said.
The livestream quickly generated widespread discussion across social media platforms, with many viewers expressing sadness, concern, and support for the animator. Others highlighted the broader issues raised by his story, including the challenges faced by people living with chronic illnesses, the high cost of healthcare, and the financial instability that many independent online creators experience when serious health problems prevent them from working.
Gilardi’s announcement has also renewed conversations about chronic pain conditions such as fibromyalgia, which are often misunderstood despite affecting millions of people worldwide. Although the condition is not considered terminal, many patients report years of severe pain, fatigue, and disability that can profoundly affect their mental health, employment, and overall quality of life.
His comments underscore the often-overlooked realities faced by individuals living with chronic illnesses—where physical suffering, emotional strain, and financial hardship can intersect in life-altering ways.
As of now, Gilardi has not announced any timeline or confirmed plans regarding assisted dying. His statement reflects that he is considering the option rather than indicating that any procedure has been scheduled.
His candid discussion has prompted many supporters to share messages of encouragement while hoping that additional medical treatment, financial assistance, or other forms of support may still become available. Regardless of what ultimately happens, his story has sparked an international conversation about chronic pain, healthcare costs, disability, and the complex ethical questions surrounding assisted dying.
